Flirting is perhaps the most important aspect of beginning any romantic and sexual relationship. As Swingers you really need to be on top of your flirting. Since we meet so many people in non-monogamy, how do we know when to start flirting, and how do we make it work for us? We're including this as an unofficial companion to our "Swinging for Dummies" series since it just feels right, so take a listen and hear about how to get new interactions going, with the flirt, and with our friend Reid Mihalko!

Also... for what the defintion of "is" is...

Visit the Burlesque Toyshop and get a 20% discount when you use the promo code swingburlesque at checkout! Check out Sliquid's line of Sensual Massage Oils, including their Serenity and Unscented lines!

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Come with us for The Swingset Takes Desire '14!

Comments? Complaints? Join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Cooper does a one man show Primer on Swinging recorded live at <a href="http://thepleasurechest.com/chicago_hours.htm">The Pleasure Chest in Chicago</a>. All audience questions have been replaced by the dulcet tones of our own Dylan Thomas for their protection, and also for the amusement of our listeners.

Class description:

"Cooper Beckett, from the podcast Life on the Swingset, takes you through the common peaks and valleys of beginning swinging, covering jealousy, safer sex practices, communication and more. Whether you're brand new to swinging, been doing it for years, or just fascinated by the idea, there's something here for everyone."

When as adults we don't know what's going on with our sexuality, it can most often be chalked up to a lack of education. Education about risk, sure, but also education about the awesome things sex can bring. One woman looking to combat in a big way this lack of education is Megan Andelloux who speaks on an amazing variety of sexuality related topics at colleges across the nation.

We discuss abstinence only education, glbtq awareness, sexual fluidity and identity, safer and risk aware sex, and the perils of teaching newly minted adults about the basics of biology and orgasm.

Visit the Burlesque Toyshop and get a 20% discount when you use the promo code swingburlesque at checkout! Check out the Guide to Getting it on by Paul Joannides!

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Come with us for The Swingset Takes Desire '14!

Comments? Complaints? Comment here on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

We still tend to treat the single male swinger as a problem, a pariah, when we host parties we wonder how to limit unpartnered male responses, we tense up at larger events where the male to female ratio may be wildly unbalanced, we are constantly on the lookout for the creep, the man who doesn't take no well, the recluse.

But really. What the fuck?

We're all just people, and we all just like to fuck, and when it comes down to it, we all know single men that have brought great joy, and great orgasms to many of ours or our partners' lives and really... that's what matters.

We take some time to deconstruct the single male swinger.

Handjobs and Fingering! 

Now that we have your attention, we want everyone to remember that there's lots of pleasure to be hand through the wonders of the partnered manual stimulation of someone's genitals with fingers! Now that you're obviously terribly turned on, take a listen and you'll hear us setting a solid definition of what counts as a handjob and a discussion on different terms and euphemisms for it, talking about how to give and receive risk aware handjobs, and talk about why we'd even bother giving handjobs when we can put penises in peoples' vaginas!

Pay extra attention, Ginger and Dylan give particularly... "riveting" instructions on how to approach playing with women and their vulvas. It's good stuff.

Dylan also realizes he's been confusing edging with edge play... He also confuses "hominem" with "onomatopoeia" so please excuse him.

We took and answered a question about erections, specifically that even after obtaining a prescription for viagra that a gentlemen still experiences trouble while swinging and that it's resulted in less return couples than he and his wife are happy with; Ginger is a big fan of people getting what they need, Cooper and Dylan relay their experiences and strategies about expectations and Miko really just lays down the law and says "it doesn't matter". We continue on with a conversation about gossip and cliques forming in a previously sexy and fun private online swinging group, dealing with high school level drama where Ginger suggests strongly stepping up as a leader and rebuilding the group with an ethos of inclusion. We close with a conversation about attraction and body types at a swing club, with Dylan chiming in about bodies being conduits to pleasure.

We also call out Lady Cheeky for execution of the longest and most successful sustained campaign against the Swingset's concentration and ability to podcast ever, including highlights such as #madtitties and flirting with Dylan. You can also find her at SmutForSmarties.com.

Today we stick all our collective hands into our mailbag and pull your questions out! We're back for our twelve attempt at Gang Banging the Mailbag!

We tackle questions about the black ring right handmovement, about discovering people you work with on swinger sites, on playing spontaneously with STIs, on attempting to open up after cheating, on judging people based on looks, and on swinging as a single male. Enjoy!

Today, we discuss double penetration, double vaginal penetration, and double anal penetration, and not just the acts themselves. The act of any sort of double penetration requires thoughtfulness, planning, collaboration, communication, really just enhanced versions of all the skills we learned via trial by fire while finding our own ways into non-monogamy. As DP really is "professional grade" fucking we break it down into the basics, positions, risk-aware practices and being mindful of condom on condom friction, maintaining sufficient erections, being comfortable touching cocks, and we move onto how great it feels and how in the moment it can be easy to lose focus.

Sabrina Morgan is a tireless advocate for sex workers’ rights and education on sex work. Having experience as a sex worker herself, as well as practicing ethical non-monogamy presents its own unique set of challenges when navigating relationships, and she’s here to talk to us about that. We also answer the age old question "Has Cooper been anally fisted?"

Shame, it creeps up on us, sometimes out of nowhere and sometimes as a slow buildup but it can affect our sexuality in ways we don't expect and don't want. Sometimes tackling shame head on helps, sometimes not addressing it at all helps, but shame when tied in to the wonderful world of non-monogamy can be complex and disconcerting to your multiple partners. Charlie Glickman joins us to help sort out the why, the how, the what, and ways we can process and deal with shame in thoughtful and effective ways so we can get back to doing what most of us really want to do... fucking multiple partners.

We hit some major points along the discussion. Using the word should implies shame, it implies judgment, that I know better than you. When we react to shame it reinforces that shame. Keep heavy conversations and fights out of the bedroom. Also keep televisions and smartphones out of the bedroom. Go for a walk together instead, being side by side can disarm adversarial feelings that can creep up from being face to face, aka: Ginger's "side to side not nose to nose" philosophy. 

Resources on exploring shame:

Sharon Ellison: Taking the War Out of our Words

Pema Chödrön: Getting Unstuck

Brené Brown

We always recommend Charlie Glickman and Aislinn Emirzian's "The Ultimate Guide to Prostate Pleasure" , a great way to carry condoms with you for safer sexy time. Get a 20% discount when you use the promo code swingburlesque at checkout.

We also name check Tristan Taormino's Rough Sex through Ginger's adoration of a scene with Sasha Grey.

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Come with us for The Swingset Takes Desire '14?

Comments? Complaints? Visit Reddit.com's /r/Swingers; Search for SS 150, or (if you must) click here!