Life on the Swingset - The Swinging & Polyamory Podcast

Today, on this last day of 2015, we commit to one more gang bang… the mailbag episode. We discuss dating apps, changes in desire, situational erectile dysfunction and jealousy and panic attacks. Questions have been edited for time and clarity. If you have a question for The Swingset, please call 573-55 SWING that's 573-557-9464 to leave your voicemail for an upcoming mailbag episode!

 

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

 

We featured the following music in today’s episode: Sushi Killer & Kevin Villecc’s - Anime Bae, Stephen Walking – Claptrap, OpenWater & Matt Vice – No Regrets, and DotEXE – Gibberish.

 

Buy "My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory" as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook at mylifeontheswingset.com and pre-order my novel A Life Less Monogamous and save 25% on the ebook or paperback at alifelessmonogamous.com!

 

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out! 

Direct download: swingset234.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 3:49pm CST

Hey, it’s Cooper, and boy, it's the holidays again, and here I sit in the Ski Chalet high atop Mount Swingset, crackling fire, hot chocolate spiked with RumChata, wearing my 10th Doctor onesie and reminiscing. I think about all that's happened this year, the things that changed, my god. The only thing that could make this evening better is...oh, look out the window! Why it's Ginger Bentham

%smalltalk%

While you're helping yourself to a drink, Gin, I see another good friend, former swinger president himself, Dylan Thomas!

%smalltalk%

Why it’s Katie Mack! Welcome to the Chalet

 

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

We featured an absurd amount of music today.

In addition to the wonderful Rachel Lark’s There’s Nothing Sexy about Christmas and O’ Poly Night we played:

DotEXE - Come Back To Me

Hellberg - Jingle Bells

Mr. FijiWiji - Imaginary Friend, featuring Brenton Mattheus

Muzzy - Snowman Swag

Rogue - Goodbye (Winter Chords)

Stephen Walking - Sleigh Ride

and Televisor's - We Wish You a Merry Christmas.

Buy "My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory" as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook at mylifeontheswingset.com and pre-order my novel A Life Less Monogamous and save 25% on the ebook or paperback at alifelessmonogamous.com!

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

 

 

Direct download: swingset233.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 10:19pm CST

The degree of complexity in relationship dynamics is exponential in non-monogamy. What that bullshit was trying to say, was that people are complicated, and every time you add one to your life, things get more complicated. One of the most difficult situations in non-monogamy is helping your partner or paramour deal with major life and relationship flux that doesn't directly involve you.

 

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Today our intro and outro featured Astronaut – Champions, the WRLD Remix featuring Harry Brooks Junior. Our commercial interludes and end of the episode outtakes featured PIXL – Here For You, featuring Q’AILA.

Buy "My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory" as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook at mylifeontheswingset.com and pre-order my novel A Life Less Monogamous and save 25% on the ebook or paperback at alifelessmonogamous.com!

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Direct download: swingset232.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:29am CST

Soooo, hi guys, it’s Dylan, and I have this problem. Sometimes I want to be up close and personal with someone. I want that full body contact. I want to slide right up next to someone while I'm sliding in and out of someone, I want to kiss them gently, I want my hair in their face and their hair in my face, I want to feel their breath on my neck and I want to feel the weight of my chest pushing against their tits.

But. sometimes I want to sit back, stand back, kneel back, and just fucking fuck the people I'm fucking. I want to watch them move, I want to see their faces scrunch, I want to watch their tits bounce, I want to give them a slap, a smack, and I want to watch my cock as it pistons in and out of someone

But you know someone I want to flip someone over and pound them against a headboard. Sometimes I want to execute the rare triple lutz upper decker reverse cowgirl in the pyramid configuration.

But sometimes things get in the way. Genital position, body type, genital shape, friction points, stamina, and ability can conspire to work against crafting the scene I want or the grouping I want, and I just won't be able to fuck the person or people I want to fuck the way I want to fuck them.

Do I give up? Do -YOU- give up?

Fuck no!

We have the knowledge, we have the technology, we have the simple machines, we have the will, and we'll craft the way,

 

You can find Crista Anne at her website and on twitter @pinkness!

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Today our intro and outro featured Feint - We Won't Be Alone (feat. Laura Brehm) and our end of the episode outtakes featured Deon Custom – Together.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Direct download: swingset231.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:10pm CST

Hello and many Greetings to all you perverts, I’m recording live from Desire Resort & Spa in Cancun, Mexico! Earlier today I sat down with upwards of thirty, and likely many less than two hundred perverts for a discussion about spaces. What makes a space special? What helps make people feel safe? What makes a space a focal point for a community?

As we moved through a “how do we find other perverts” discussion, we stumbled on the question of what it means to stay closeted and to come out these days, drawing parallels and differences between the nonmonogamous and queer communities, and examining how it’s possible to win the hearts and minds of others when engaging them “behind enemy lines”.

Usually I’d have a little more to say, but I’m all talked out… and kissed out, and blissed out… I mean, really, if you’ve never made out with a tequila flavored shotglass…. You should give it a try.

But before you search for a shotglass with a flared base, this has been… quite literally, been a recording taken at the Gentleperverts’ Social Club, on location, in Mexico. You can find more Gentleperverts’ Social Club podcasts every month at www.gentleperverts.com and discuss our latest episodes and topics on twitter with @GentlePerverts and me @DylanTheThomas. You can find me, Dylan Thomas, on FacebookSpotify and Fetlife as DylanTheThomas. If you have a submission, a story, a signal boost request, or an idea for a topic send that over to me at dylan@lifeontheswingset.com. If you like having me record live, on location, throw me a buck or two at tip.gentleperverts.com.

Thanks for listening, and I hope to hear from you all soon.

Direct download: gentleperverts009.mp3
Category:SSDesire -- posted at: 12:32am CST

This year for Swingset Takes Desire we hosted a bunch of kinky events, and a great time was had by all. This discussion-group style episode was recorded live on our last full day at the resort, full of reminiscence of good times had and great ideas for next year’s full-resort takeover.

Listen to this episode for a discount code that will score you 10% off at Extreme Restraints…on every order you ever make!

 

Show Links:

Sponsored by Extreme Restraints

Ending The Sexual Dark Age On Facebook-Please “LIKE”

Audience Demographic Survey (Please take a moment to respond)

Direct download: ESA075.mp3
Category:SSDesire -- posted at: 11:09pm CST

Desire. It's an emotion, raw and real. It's a place, warm and inviting, November 7th through the 14th of 2015, we made it our space. We brought 79 (and a half, thanks to the amazing Kendra Holliday) couples to Cancun, to the Riviera Maya, to Mexico, to the Desire Resort & Spa, and we collectively made the resort our own.

J.V. Altharas and Shara Bono joined us once again to co-host the trip, run kink demonstration and education events, and all in all... to enjoy and consume everything available in paradise, in the sexiest place on earth.

 

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

The Swingset Takes Over Desire 2016: Choose Your Own Adventure! Join us November 5th through the 12th of 2016 as we execute a complete take over of Desire Resort & Spa in the Riviera Maya, in Cancun, in Mexico... in Paradise.

Today, our "between the commercials" music featured Varien - Transmissions from Lemuria, our commercial bumpers used samples from Deon Custom - Together, our outro featured Nigel Good - No Way Back Up (feat. Illuminor) and our "super special conversations" were backed by Karma Fields - Skyline.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Direct download: swingset230.mp3
Category:SSDesire -- posted at: 7:47am CST

Hi Swingset Fans! We're in Desire and we don't have a new episode for you this week but we're recharging, recording, and we'll be back next week with another wonderful episode with Crista Anne on The Physics of Sex - Bodies, Positions, Objects in Motion, and Mad Mods.

If you want more I suggest heading over to Swingset.FM and checking out the latest The Gentleperverts' Social Club, Intellectual Foreplay, Eat The Rudecast, Sex Ed A-Go-Go, or... check out our Swingset Classic: Swingerpiece Theater Presents - Weinergate 2: The Embiggening.

Also consider supporting our ability to continue serving you by contributing as little as a dollar an episode or a dollar a month at lifeontheswingset.com/tip.

 

Thanks!

Direct download: swingset229.1.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:07am CST

Many of us are easily attracted to other people, That can lead us to wanting to be with ALL of the people. Swinging lends itself to that pretty well but poly, not so much. Of course, as with anything, abundant swinging can go bad and abundant poly can be amazing. When you do non-monogamy right, abundance comes often and it can feel like a burden, like a curse, even when your problem is an overflow of wonderful people and hot hot sex.

 

You can find Crista Anne at her website and on twitter @pinkness!

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Today, our intro featured Nigel Good - No Way Back Up (feat. Illuminor), our "between the commercials" music featured Varien - Transmissions from Lemuria, and we ended the show with Karma Fields - Skyline.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

 

Direct download: swingset229.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 2:01am CST

One of the most enjoyable experiences you can have is putting on your headphones, closing your eyes, and listening to Rose Caraway, the Sexy Librarian, breathe some erotica right into your ears. Tonight we're talking with Rose about her audiobook erotica, phone sex, and dirty talk

 

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Life on the Swingset's outro featured Varien - Transmissions from Lemuria. We also featured Nigel Good - No Way Back Up (feat. Illuminor)Deon Custom - Together and Protostar & Draper - Chrysalis.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Head over to Reddit.com/r/SwingsetFM and let us know what you think!

Direct download: swingset228.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:44am CST

Tonight we're exploring our thoughts on sexual attraction, what it means and why we're attracted to others, why others may be attracted to us and how that feels, and perhaps most important of all, what makes us feel sexy.

We discuss attraction to others; what you're attracted to, how that changes over time, what draws you in, what to do with that attraction. We ponder what being attracted to types means, we think about generosity and attraction, and we talk about weight loss and self-perception.

Direct download: swingset227.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 5:29pm CST

A while back, though who knows how long, because memory is fluid, like sexuality, Ginger, the coiner of terms, suggested Sintrovert and Sextrovert as two leading categories of sexually explorative folk. These modified versions of introvert and extrovert help to remove the stigma attached, and suggest that however you embrace your sexuality, you're on the right page for engaging.

 

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Today, Life on the Swingset's outro featured Protostar & Draper - Chrysalis.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Head over to Reddit.com/r/SwingsetFM and let us know what you think!

Direct download: swingset226.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:55pm CST

"Why Are People Into That" is a question that people around the world ask of many things, often about various sexual kinks, fetishes, and practices. Podcast host Tina Horn asks on a regular basis, as her show deconstructs with a guest why people might be into a certain thing. We decided to turn that question around for our discussion with her and ask Why we push our sexual boundaries, and why doing so is important. That's tonight on Life on the Swingset the podcast.

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Today, Life on the Swingset's outro featured Protostar & Draper - Chrysalis.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Head over to Reddit.com/r/SwingsetFM and let us know what you think!

Direct download: swingset225.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:47pm CST

Our discussion of genitals, both our own and those belonging to other people, simply could not be contained by a single episode, so we return to the subject again, this time discussing labiaplasty, penis enlargement, being happy with your genitals as they are, body hair, shaving, and performance issues (ie, am I hard enough, am I wet enough?)

Support Life on the Swingset by buying a shirt, buying condoms, leaving us a review on iTunes or Stitcher, or by leaving us a tip! You can leave us a tip for every episode we release, including some special rewards for those willing to tip us just a little more!

Today, Life on the Swingset's outro featured Protostar & Draper - Chrysalis.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Head over to Reddit.com/r/SwingsetFM and let us know what you think!

Direct download: swingset224.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 2:15pm CST

Whether you had to find a mirror to see yours or you could just look down and not miss it, we've all had first encounters with our bits, you know, our genitals. In a culture that espouses a specific body ideal, we can't escape wondering if even our most private parts hold up by comparison. Bodies are amazing because of diversity not despite it. In this episode, Cooper, Ginger, Dylan and Katie Mack discuss how body positivity wins the day.

To SheVibe: Thank you! Your magazine cover is … without too much hyperbole… possibly the greatest thing that has ever happened. It’s amazing and we will show our appreciation at every opportunity. We dedicate this episode to you.

We discuss a couple email responses to the following letters (warning: politics ahead):

Cooper... Cooper... Cooper... I'm disappointed. I listen to your podcast regularly and am a fan. But as a Kinkster/swinger/conservative I have to say I was saddened by your recent spewing of vitriol towards anyone who doesn't believe as you believe.

For background.... I am a straight, polyamorous, loving dominant male. I was raised with 4 sisters by parents that instilled common courtesy and respect. From the day I started studying about alternative lifestyles, I was repeatedly reminded that "My kink is not your kink". I understood that as a clear directive to not be derisive towards another's proclivities. As long as it was safe sane and consensual, more power to them. I may not know all the intricacies of their dynamic and it wasn't my job to pass judgement. I had hoped for the same kind of inclusion and acceptance from your podcast. Your dismissive attitude towards Christians and republicans was quite disconcerting. Your right to be an Atheist does not preclude another from believing in the "fairy tales" they hold dear. Your right to vote based on a woman's choice of what to do with their body does not preclude another from believing that bigger government will NOT ensure the rights of the individual are protected and/or provided for. With the history of Conrail, the Postal Service and Veterans Hospitals as examples, I'm more convinced than ever that the answer lies in the community rather than a larger ineffective centralized governments control.

I'm sure you don't want to hear my political leanings any more than I want to hear about your epic prostate orgasm. That being said, I would never denigrate you for your kink or political affiliations.

And to Dylan:

Just finished LotSS 220, and I wanted to write in with a comment on Dylan's suggestion for a family-friendly sexy vacation destination.

While he's anxiously waiting for Disney Cruise Lines to launch their Multi-Tier Mascot Mediterranean Fuckboat, his suggestion of a build-your-own vacation is workable, with one caveat; expecting a gathering of children to make it through the night without finding -something- they think they need an adult for, especially when it's super important that they stay away, is utter folly, no matter how much you pay the kids who are ostensibly in charge. But this is a problem that can be solved by logistics. If you know you have N couples with children who would be up for a sexy vacation (I am assuming you are on the board of the Homeowners Association to have access to that sort of info) you book your hotel rooms for at least N nights. Each couple then volunteers to watch the kids during one evening while the rest of the party congregates at a room at an entirely different hotel for sexy times. That way, every adult gets at least N-1 opportunities to participate, the kids get N awesome sleepover-like parties, and nobody has to leave their kids under the care of someone they don't trust enough to show their junk to.

Remember, it takes a village to raise an orgy.

Direct download: swingset223.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 2:12am CST

Swingset does as Chicago does with a 3-peat dip into the mailbag! We discuss discuss shy male swingers, just starting out in the lifestyle, couples’ jealousy, frustration with people who don’t read online profiles in their entirety, and Christian swingers! As always questions are edited for time and cohesion. If you have a question for an upcoming mailbag show, please leave us a voicemail at 573-557-9464.

Warning: Dylan tells TWO stories, and neither are particularly sexy but both are fairly gripping!

 

Question 1:

I'm hoping for some words of wisdom for a guy in the lifestyle who struggles to be appropriately assertive. While single I was one of those guys who needed flares, sirens, and flashing lights to know a woman was interested in me, and even then I was often hesitant. I'm now happily coupled and in the lifestyle, but no better at hitting on women or initiating any touching.

Part of my hang-up is the nausea induced by certain sleazy guys who "accidentally" rub against people in crowds or greet everyone with a grope. But a balance between assault and friendly passivity can't be that hard to find, right? This has created some tension with my better half, because she feels as if she has to do more of the work when we're in sexy circumstances, and it makes it harder for me to enjoy lifestyle events.

 

Question 2:

My wife and I have a wonderful marriage, awesome communication and an even better sex life. We're entertaining a soft swap, FMF interaction. We want to make an informed decision together before fully trying swinging. What can you suggest tips, advice, information wise? And what's the next step if we wanted to go through with it?

Dylan Thomas’ note:

By the way, our wonderful “Swinging for Beginners” series has quite a bit of content that can help! Visit lifeontheswingset.com/category/swinging-for-beginners for nine episodes where we focus entirely on the “new to the lifestyle” experience!

 

Question 3:

We were doing a lot of lifestyle events and really never met anyone that tripped both of our triggers until we met this one couple. We became very close, sharing each other and attending sexy events but staying faithful to each other as couples until recently. They attended an event and hooked up with a group of people, didn't invite us and now we are struggling with the relationship. Sort of had our hearts broken. We never had any kind of agreement to stay with each other so we can't fault them. Wondering if you have any advice?

 

Question 4:

We're busy and don't play with other couples (we prefer threesomes and orgies). That doesn't mean we don't want to meet sexy new friends, just that we'd rather do it in larger settings. We also get a fair amount of attention on the swinger dating sites -- almost always from couples who want to meet up. (Our profile is clear that we don't play with couples, but it's obvious that some people only look at pictures.) Responding with something like, "we're not available to meet, but we'll be at a meet and greet so please come and say hello!" has always been met with silence. Are we doing something wrong? Is there a better way to say what we're looking for?

 

Question 5:

We are Christians and go to church on Sunday. Are there a lot of Christian swingers? I'm afraid it will feel a little weird going to a club and having some fun then going to church a few days later.

Direct download: swingset222.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 1:40am CST

Welcome back to the Life on the Swingset mailbag where we're reading listener questions! As always questions are edited for time and cohesion unlike this podcast. If you have a question for an upcoming mailbag show, please leave us a voicemail at 573-557-9464 or send us an email at contact@lifeontheswingset.com. Tonight we discuss partnering with a former swinger as a monogamous couple, holding out on ejaculation, coming out as an atheist, and trusting each other in the lifestyle.

 

We also review the Fleshjack Go, we run a giveaway for Cinekink Chicago, and run a giveaway for free audible copy of My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging and Polyamory, but you have to listen to find out how to win!

Today, Life on the Swingset's outro and voicemail featured Protostar & Draper - Chrysalis.

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Head over to Reddit.com/r/SwingsetFM and let us know what you think!

Direct download: swingset221.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 4:05pm CST

We're dipping back into the mailbag for another Life on the Swingset gang bang of your listener voicemails and emails. As always questions are edited for time and cohesion. If you have a question for an upcoming mailbag show, please leave us a voicemail at 573-557-9464 or email us at contact@lifeontheswingset.com.

We discuss swinging as a recovering alcoholic, discussing sex with vanilla friends, why men are / aren’t bad at sex in the lifestyle, sexy vacations … with kids?!, waning desire, and whether girl on girl play counts as full swap or soft swap!  Plus… PLUS… We enjoy cameos by Morgan Freeman, Sean Connery, Mason Verger, Christopher Walken, and Reid Mihalko!

Direct download: swingset220.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 3:03am CST

Everybody's sex drive is different, and it's likely that everybody who has ever had a sex drive has had assumptions made about it. Swingers, polyamorists, and other non-mono practicioners have had loads of assumptions made about their sex drive. So tonight on Life on the Swingset, the Podcast we're going to discuss those assumptions, and how the concept of sex drive is often seen through gendered and socio economic lenses. 

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Head over to Reddit.com/r/SwingsetFM and let us know what you think!

Direct download: swingset219.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 6:47pm CST

Do white rocks in front of a house in the suburbs mean there might be swingers inside? Believe it or not, this is still a question we get, without fail, every month or so. This way of picking out swingers is a part of our history. Then history became legend. Legend became myth. And along with so many ideas about swinging, open relationships, and sexuality, they became part of the rich folklore that has accompanied our favorite past-time. We discuss swinger history and sexual folklore with guestDr. Jeana Jorgensen.

Direct download: swingset218.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 1:06pm CST

Recently, our own United States of America had a watershed moment. An injustice so deeply ingrained into what we've called society, what we've called family, what we've called "real and respectable” with one fell swoop, became righted as a matter of not just public policy, but as law.

The Supreme Court's decision on Obergefell v. Hodges granted marriage equality for all persons, and while the rest of the country's legal structure catches up to the new reality, we're seeing a vocal minority of polyamorous people... and a surprising amount of popular media address the possibility of multiple partner marriage… Poly marriage.

We welcome Cunning Minx back to the Swingset, where she and Dylan step on their soap boxes and bring up Justice Roberts’ dissent’s thoughts on a plural marriage slippery slope, Justice Kennedy’s majority opinion based on fundamental rights instead of the expected equal protection. We discuss what marriage is anyway and what it represents between us as people, us as the government, and us and our beliefs. We look at where polyamorous groupings and families are vulnerable and what marriage, or a set of contracts granting protection, or possibly an incorporation would do to protect them.

Also… we discuss why we’re in the “Reefer Madness” stage of the general public recognizing what polyamory is.

Some articles that might interest you since they informed our discussion (for better or worse… THANKS MEDIA):

http://thefederalist.com/2015/07/06/polyamory-is-bad-for-kids-polyamorists-and-society/#disqus_thread

http://www.theatlantic.com/politics/archive/2015/07/case-against-polygamy/397823/?utm_source=SFFB

http://www.washingtonpost.com/news/acts-of-faith/wp/2015/07/10/heres-why-people-are-arguing-over-whether-polygamy-is-the-next-gay-marriage-debate/

http://www.slate.com/articles/news_and_politics/politics/2015/06/is_polygamy_next_after_gay_marriage_chief_justice_roberts_obergefell_dissent.html

Direct download: swingset217.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 1:35pm CST

We all go on dates. Maybe it's a play date with another sexy couple. Maybe it's a romantic getaway with a partner we only see every couple months. Maybe it's a night of taking off your clothes and cleaning someone's apartment for them while they watch you barely contain your excitement. We all date, and we all eventually have other relationships, people we're making a life with, other people we're fucking, maybe a daddy, and while what we're doing is ultimately our business, we still want to do right by and be right with the people we choose to call our people.

We discuss how hard it is to manage multiple relationships and that respecting multiple people simultaneously while developing new relationships takes skill, mindfulness, presence, and lots of communication of expectations, needs and considarations.

Direct download: swingset216.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 2:10pm CST

We've all been in situations that we were really... REALLY eager to be in.... then realize in the moment maybe we don't want to be in this particular situation but you like everyone involved and you don't want to spoil the mood, and you want to step back gracefully and disengage. We discuss learning how to get a handle on your own emotions both in the moment and after, we relay some of our strategies in communicating lack of enthusiasm for the act without accidentally conveying lack of enthusiasm for the person, and take care of some "business".

Direct download: swingset215.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 10:37am CST

In the wake of both Fetlife and Adult Friend Finder getting their content and naughty secrets scraped and posted online, there has been a renewed discussion about secrecy and privacy in swinging & polyamory. Katie Mack joins us to discuss these topics and think about what it means to be secretive, how it relates to our own private closets and give you suggestions on maintaining your cone of privacy in the modern Internet age. Social networks, dating & swinging sites, privacy v. secrecy, photos, (more) secure payment methods, burner phones and email accounts are all on the table.

Here’s a Krebs on Security article on recent breaches. Here’s an article addressing the AdultFriendFinder breach.

Direct download: swingset214.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:28pm CST

Welcome to our 21st Gang Bang the Mailbag! As always, if you want to ask a question via voicemail or text: 573-55-SWING, that's 573-557-9464, or send us an email at contact@lifeontheswingset.comAs always we want to remind those of you at home to tweet along with us at #sspodcast

We address a “The Professor” callout from a listener on the definition of monogamy, a listener looking for advice on an MFM in Tokyo, large age differences between partners in swinging, a listener whose wife kind of wants out of non-monogamy, and the trials and tribulations of being with a partner who has two left sexual feet.

Cooper also throws out there that a great name for a new band would be Suburbanesque World of Heteronormative Privilege.

Also from Dylan:

OH GOD IT WAS Q-TIP!

CANADA, YOU DID THIS TO ME

Direct download: swingset213.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 1:33pm CST

Believe it or not, our voicemail gang bang overflowed and we were left with extra voicemails. With that in mind, we've collected some listener emails to do our twentieth mailbag gangbang! As always, if you want to ask a question via voicemail or text: 573-55-SWING, that's 573-557-9464, or send us an email at contact@lifeontheswingset.com. All questions have been edited to fit in the space allowed.

We discuss meeting opposite partners before private dates, expectations and consent, making the first move at clubs, soft swapping with single males and solidifying rules as newbies as well as getting over boundary violations.

Direct download: swingset212.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:04am CST

Holy Shit Shira B. Katz is here! … and she’s causing trouble! … and she starts a wonderful conversation with Ginger about mindfulness! ….and she asks what we’ve been doing with our lives and we update her with an episode almost entirely about “our business” which included the introduction of the term relationship anarchy.

It was a pleasure and we hope it happens again. J

…also “dumping with Dylan” may become a thing now. And I guess “Just the Tip with Dylan Thomas”.

Maybe.

Whatever.

 

We reference Headspace (the website that apparently treats your head right) and Dr. Dan Siegel’s book Mindsight

Direct download: swingset211.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:18am CST

Adult film star, author, sex educator, outspoken feminist and advocate for sexual acceptance Nina Hartley joins and honors us with a conversation on the Swingset.

Nina was a pioneer of sex positivity before sex positivity was a thing. A prolific performer, an outspoken feminist and an advocate for sexual acceptance (as a board member of the Woodhull Sexual Freedom Alliance), Nina is the sexual freedom fighter we all admire. We are deeply honored to welcome her onto the Swingset.

After Nina leaves, Dylan responds to an email we received regarding our latest Bedcast by both acknowledging our own failings and by shining light on the absurdity of claiming lack of responsibility through silence and complacency.

Direct download: swingset210.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:03am CST

Vacations. Aren't they great? But you know what's better? SEXY VACATIONS. The kind where you can be naked and flirt all day and have sex all night. Or maybe you decide on an afternoon delight. Of course, on vacation, you have time for all of the above! For those who've never been on a sexy vacation, they can also be intimidating and scary. For our ninth Swinging for Dummies episode we, enthusiastic advocates of the sexy vacation, share what we have learned so that your next sexy vacation is everything you want it to be and more. That's tonight on Life on the Swingset the podcast.

 

Tonight's episode is sponsored by our good friends at Gamelink.com, which is where you should be going for your porn!

Direct download: swingset209.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:49pm CST

Adult film star and filmmaker jessica drake has seen the porn industry through some of its most radical and affecting changes, and has moved herself from star to writer to educator with her jessica drake's Guide to Wicked Sex Series. Tonight she's joining us to discuss this evolution of an industry. We chat about how the industry deals with the double edged sword of the Internet, the difference between porn as entertainment and porn as education, cyber bullying, and we giggled about sitting on the floor crosslegged.

Direct download: ss208.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:46am CST

Way back in 2011 Life on the Swingset issued a pleasure quest. Find a quality ejaculating dildo. Over the years, we did NOT find quality dildos, we DID find Miko, though, so it was a win over all. Tonight we have Steph Berman with us, creator of The Semenette, the best ejaculating dildo I've ever seen, to talk with us about simulacrum genitals.

We spoke at length about the original mission of The Semenette, to provide a way for partners to conceive and still connect in a sexy and fun way, and opened up to possibilities of users and partners playing in safe and non procreative ways; pegging, cum play, new ways for those with erectile dysfunction to still experience the pleasure of ejaculating on and in someone... it's a very versatile dildo.

Direct download: swingset207.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 10:32am CST

We're back with more Swinging basics in our Swinging for Dummies series! Full Swap and Soft Swap are the two main classifications of swinging, with full swap including traditional PIV/PIA ( penis in vagina/penis in anus ) sex and soft swap not. Tonight on Life on the Swingset the podcast, we're going to be talking about the decision making that can lead you from one classification to another, as well as the benefits and drawbacks of both. But, you know, sexy like.

 

Also… Take a listen to The Drifters – Save the Last Dance For Me!

Direct download: swingset206.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 10:09am CST

We hit the jackpot when it comes to voicemail questions in this episode. In fact, our voicemailbag runneth over. The Swingset crew gathers around to listen to your questions this time around. The crew tackle questions about humans being suited for monogamy, use of alcohol in the lifestyle, defense of the no kissing rule in the lifestyle, even the use of the term "the lifestyle." There's also a special treat for you, Swingsetters. Enjoy the song "Sock Puppet" by the band Sticky Biscuits. An awesome song about fisting. 

Keeping calling in with those voicemail questions. We'd love to do more Gang Bang The VoicemailBag episodes.

Direct download: swingset205v2.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 3:16pm CST

So many people don’t know what they want or need sexually. Discovering those wants and needs can be a difficult process without some sexual sherpa to guide them. Then they need to be able to turn those wants into requests, so they can get all the hedonistic delight they deserve as members of the human race. Cooper Beckett, Ginger Bentham, Dylan Thomas, & Miko Technogeisha, hosts of Life on the Swingset, The Podcast, bring you a live interactive discussion about figuring out what you want, and how to ask for it.

We cover self-exploration, defining and exploring boundaries, communicating desire and being attentive, as well as open the floor up to audience questions and stories.

Direct download: swingset204v2.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:26pm CST

Hazy insanity, that is all.

"It's like Goldschlager, you want to see the chunks."

"When I'm rubbing lube on your cock, I just want to, feel the chunks."

let me google that for you: pig penis

"Is Ginger now the other white meat?" - J.V.

Tom Ridge's Color Coding System for Swingset Podcasts "I've got a code brown."

Cooper's Leetspeak needs some help, thought "FTW" meant "fuck the world" #oldmancooper

"Obviously we are all down with OPP." "Other people's pork?" (Ginger wtf)

"I asked Gillian Anderson out... on twitter." - Ginger

"We did white privilege roleplay." - Miko

 

You can find this and other bedcasts at lifeontheswingset.com/whatthefuck

Dylan as Tom Cruise on Oprah's Couch lifeontheswingset.com/14993/ss-111-in-bed-with-the-swingset-ii-recorded-live-at-catalystcon-east/

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Join us on our trip to Desire in 2015, where we're going, we don't need clothes!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset203.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 1:43pm CST

Humans have been having sex since the beginning of time. And from cave drawings to the Kama Sutra to The Joy of Sex, we have been inventing ways to communicate about the sex we are having. Then Al Gore invented the Internet and everything changed. Tonight we are excited to finally welcome esteemed sexologist, Dr Richard Wagner, also known as Dr. Dick, onto the Swingset to reflect on how technology and access to sexual information has shaped our ability to embody our most authentic sexual selves.

Direct download: ss202.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:57pm CST

Girl on girl...the mythology and visual ecstasy live large from Spring Break to Bourbon Street. Girl on girl sex is worthy of being epic. And certainly deserves more respect than main stream culture affords. Girl sex can perhaps be a little less obvious, though no less delicious. We are excited to welcome Allison Moon, author of Girl Sex 101 to episode 201 of Life on the Swingset.

Scott Adams had something to say about monogamy this week.

 

[powerpress]

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Join us on our trip to Desire in 2015, where we're going, we don't need clothes!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: ss201.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:57pm CST

In two hundred episodes of Life on the Swingset, the podcast, we've seen ethical non-monogamy go from something whispered about into something that's getting cover articles in major publications. The entire idea of alternate relationships, sexual arrangements, and partnering is having a moment. Tonight, we're thrilled to have, as our guest, Dan Savage who, whether he likes it or not, is a sort of a Podfather to our little podcast, as the vicarious thrills we got from listening to people with very sexy lives helped shape at least my interest in exploring lifestyles. 

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Join us on our trip to Desire in 2015, where we're going, we don't need clothes!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset200.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 6:42am CST

All of us living life on the Swingset are well-versed in the passion, communication, and negotiation being consensually non-monogamous requires. Yet it's rare to see our kinds of relationships portrayed in mainstream films. One such film about to be released is Marriage 2.0 written and produced by Magnus Sullivan. In Magnus's movie, we are (quote) "invited to celebrate a modern redefinition of the committed relationship...where unfettered physical and emotional intimacy can fuel our passion while strengthening the bond with those we love." Tonight we have Magnus Sullivan join us on the Swingset to talk relationships and the role movies can play in reinventing relationships.

You can find Marriage 2.0’s Twitter account here!

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

 

Direct download: swingset199.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:49pm CST

We've talked at length about the sad fact that many young people in america get the entirety of their sex ed from watching porn. When porn comes that's actually designed to educate, however, it can be revelatory. We're rejoined by old friend (and new Swingset.FM contributor) Sophie Delancey from The Art of Blowjob and the brand new Art of Cunnilingus to talk about art, educational porn, and oral sex!

Rachel Kramer Bussel wrote an article Salon.com published recently on cunnilingus.

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset198.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:32am CST

Those of us who write about sex and speak about sex and sing about sex have stepped into a unique realm in our society. Where sex was always a hush hush don't talk about it subject, we've decided to podcast, and write, and write songs, and express our sexuality into the world for many different reasons. Rachel Lark, who wrote those awesome naughty Christmas songs a few episodes ago, has joined us to talk about sexual expression, play a few songs, and have a good time.

 

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset197.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:56am CST

Cooper, Dylan, and Miko return to Milwaukee, Wisconsin's wonderful Tool Shed to reprise Swingset's discussion on play parties.

They’re whispered about, opinions are drawn, expectations are high for both attendees and non. The sex party, the play party, the swinger party, call it what you will, to anyone who’s never been to one they conjure up visions of hedonistic abandon, or deeply creepy masked affairs. With so many people looking to explore their sexuality and needing a safe place to do so, play parties have value far beyond a whole bunch of naked people in a room. They can educate as well as titillate. So that's what we're here to talk about today.

Direct download: ss196.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 2:09pm CST

In our Swinging for Dummies Series thus far, we've taken you through deciding you're open, talking to your partner, setting up your profile, and going on a first date. We think you're ready for the meat of the course now: Threesomes! We discuss the ever-present acronyms fmf, mfm, mmf, different configurations and play styles, thinking about the new person as a sex toy, an other, or as an honored guest, playing as the single and of course... negotiating threesomes, communication, when threesomes go bad and when threesomes go great!

 

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

 

Direct download: swingset195.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 2:14am CST

The Swingset welcomes back Crista Anne to discuss her recent commitment to herself; to find a path back to self-orgasm through once a day masturbation. Through her very personal and public #OrgasmQuest Crista is documenting her navigation through life-long depression, antidepressants, self-care, living and loving life and parenting and today she shares it all with us, and we share our stories with her.

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset194.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 8:06am CST

Our mailbag, full of pluck and fancy, keeps coming back with more questions for us to ponder and maybe even eventualy answer! Today we discuss swinging as parents of very young children, broken rules and people set off-limits, multiple male orgasms and never fail erections, "Poly Doesn't Work", what to do when finding out the local neighborhood teenager knows, and finding lust in Minnesota.

We also take a mid-episode break and cut to the Savage Lovecast hosted by Dan Savage where Cooper chimes in for a question about swinging. You can find the full episode (Cooper is on the Full Magnum episode) at: http://www.savagelovecast.com/episodes/430#.VL-peyvF98E

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset193.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 9:08am CST

It's a new year and there are new questions in the mailbag, even a few voicemails! Tonight on Life on the Swingset, the podcast, we gang bang the mailbag as this series turns 18. We discuss some newbie swinger questions in a lightning round style segment, post sti-transmission risk-aware sex and stigma, imbalances in attraction in coupling, and dirty talk!

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset192.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 3:45pm CST

Ginger sits down with Cooper for a one-on-one discussion of his book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory, recorded on the day of launch.

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: ss191.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:27pm CST

Consent shouldn't be something we have to teach, It's the simplest thing in the world, ask before you touch. But beyond that, consent is involved in so many aspects of our non-monogamous lives, that learning how to give and receive enthusiastic consent is one of the most important things we learn early on as we open up. So that's what we're talking about tonight on Life on the Swingset, The Podcast.

 

Give us a call and leave a voicemail at 573-55-SWING, (573-557-9464), we want your stories, your orgasms, your everything!

Buy Cooper's book My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory at MyLotSS.com

Interested in signing up for our favorite Lifestyle site Kasidie.com? Click here to try it out!

Comments? Complaints? Comment on this post or join us on Facebook.com/theswingset and let us know what you think.

Direct download: swingset190.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:16am CST

1