Life on the Swingset - The Swinging & Polyamory Podcast

Those of us young in the world and in non-monogamy don't spend a lot of time thinking about aging and in how it affects our play partners, our relationships, and our own sexuality as we progress. During Life on the Swingset's takeover of Desire Resort, Dylan Thomas sat down with Belle Shepherd, Joel Kann, Ken Haslam, and Duncan to discuss as a panel how sexuality changes with age.

Some featured discussion points:

Changes in Spontaneous Desire | Iimportance of Lubricant and Positioning During Sex | Health Issues | Community Support Networks in Polyamory | ... and many more.

 

 

Join Dylan, Cooper, Dr. Liz, Mister Pent, Dirty Lola, and Mike Joseph at Playground 2018!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Our Playground 2018 advertisement featured music by Krzysztof Słowikowski from his Mega Man 6 Guitar Playthrough titled: Knight Man. This track is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported (CC BY 3.0) license.

 

 

 

Direct download: swingset310.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 6:00am CST

Nearly everything of value Cooper learned about sex was learned after opening up. He's unashamed to admit, his sex was thoroughly mediocre. Thankfully, he met many people who were much better at sex and he studied at their feet and other parts, learning vast and valuable lessons. Tonight, on Life on the Swingset The Podcast, Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan ThomasGinger Bentham, Dirty Lola, and Dr. Liz Powell discuss their sexual failures and their sexual sherpas and the lessons they learned from them.

 

Join Dylan, Cooper, Dr. Liz, Mister Pent, Dirty Lola, and Mike Joseph at Playground 2018!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Our Playground 2018 advertisement featured music by Krzysztof Słowikowski from his Mega Man 6 Guitar Playthrough titled: Knight Man. This track is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported (CC BY 3.0) license.

 

 

Cooper S Beckett
Dr. Liz Powell

 

 

 

 

Direct download: swingset309.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 1:09am CST

As Lydia Deetz once said, "I myself am strange and unusual." Swingsetters are merry misfits who don't hew to society's traditional norms. Tonight, Ginger Bentham, Dirty Lola, Cooper S. Beckett, Dylan Thomas, and Dr. Liz Powell discuss navigating the vanilla world as sexual oddballs, and the unique sets of perks and challenges that includes.

 

Shoutout to Kevin Patterson for his book and his upcoming tour: Love’s Not Color Blind: Race and Representation in Polyamorous and Other Alternative Communities

 

Join Dylan, Cooper, Dr. Liz, Mister Pent, Dirty Lola, and Mike Joseph at Playground 2018!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

Our Playground 2018 advertisement featured music by Krzysztof Słowikowski from his Mega Man 6 Guitar Playthrough titled: Knight Man. This track is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported (CC BY 3.0) license.

 

Cooper S Beckett
Dr. Liz Powell

 

 

Direct download: swingset308-v2.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 9:50pm CST

The Swingset invites Tamara Pincus and Rebecca Hiles, authors of the new book "It's Called Polyamory" onto the show to discuss the many things people both new and experienced to nonmonogamy, specifically, polyamory, may encounter. They join Dylan Thomas, Dr. Liz Powell, and Chris Pent.

 

Find Tamara Pincus' and Rebecca Hiles' new book, It's Called "Polyamory", out on paperback and Kindle now!

 

Join Dylan, Cooper, Dr. Liz, Mister Pent, Dirty Lola, and Mike Joseph at Playground 2018!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher! Also, follow us on Spotify!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist! Thank you to djdead who purchaed mobile lavalier microphones!

 

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Our Playground 2018 advertisement featured music by Krzysztof Słowikowski from his Mega Man 6 Guitar Playthrough titled: Knight Man. This track is licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution 3.0 Unported (CC BY 3.0) license.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Dr. Liz Powell

 

Direct download: swingset307-v2.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:30am CST

Ginger BenthamCooper S. Beckett, and Dylan Thomas return to Desire Resort & Spa for Swingset’s second full resort takeover and for their sixth annual pilgrimage to the sexiest place on earth. While the tequila flows, they take time to examine why pleasure, gratitude, compassion, and love are supremely important, and they take time to defiantly and emphatically restate the values of the Swingset.

Join us at the sexiest place on earth at Desire Resorts in the Riviera Maya, Cancun, Mexico, from November 3rd through November 10th, 2018! Head to ssdesire.com for more information!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

 

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

 

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher!

 

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

 

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

 

You can now pre-order Cooper’s novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

 

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Cooper S Beckett
Direct download: swingset306.mp3
Category:SSDesire -- posted at: 9:34am CST

We’ve all spent a big chunks of our your lives trying to transform relationships from “kind of okay” into “good”. Most of us wait to have big conversations about what our relationships will look like until, well, long after they’re already a problem, but what if we could, instead, do that work early instead of just assuming that everyone is playing by the same guidelines? Dr. NerdLove joins the Swingset panel of Dr. Liz, Dirty Lola, and Mike Joseph to discuss designing your perfect relationships, talking about how to get what we all want, in advance!

You can find Harris O’Malley (AKA Dr. NerdLove) at his website, www.doctornerdlove.com and at his Youtube channel!

 

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now pre-order Cooper’s novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

Dr. Liz Powell
Direct download: swingset305.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 12:34am CST

Attraction. Chemistry, Urges. Biting our lower lip. Pants Feelings. *grunt* Join Dirty Lola, Mike Joseph, Mister Pent, and Dylan Thomas as they welcome back Bex from The Dildorks as they all talk about what turns them on!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now pre-order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Direct download: swingset304.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:58pm CST

We've answered the same question a lot lately: How do single men navigate the lifestyle? We've rightfully mentioned the mountain most single men must climb to be successful, In discussing how to raise everyone's game we focused on the fact that many single cis straight men ruin it for everyone as they're everywhere and generally not well behaved. In describing them we used a phrase coined by Madeleine Holden to describe it: "Dick is Abundant & Low Value". Alana Massey expanded on that thought and wrote The Dickonomics of Tinder, a comprehensive treatise on the low expectations game,

Bex Caputo joins Dirty Lola, Mike Joseph, Mister Pent, and Dylan Thomas to discuss how the phrase came into use, why it's useful, and the implications of its use.

While we spoke, we mentioned Billy Procida by reputation. Dylan decided to mention him by name and reference both his blog, "You're Not An Ally, You're An Asshole" and a Storify of people who've been negatively affected by interactions.

 

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now pre-order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Direct download: swingset303.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 10:08pm CST

Sometimes we lose sight of some of the people and some of the things that matter in ourlives. Dr. Liz Powell, Mike Joseph, and Dylan Thomas get together and figure out how to recognize it, how it happens, and how to pull everything back together.

Dr. Liz also takes some time to relay some con business while Dylan mentions his newly unlocked "double flogging" achievement.

 

Dr. Liz mentions the Sinha Intensive/Expansive Framework, developed by Leela Sinha, M. Div. You can find Your Not Too Much: Intensive Lives in an Expansive World on Amazon.

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now pre-order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

 

Dr. Liz Powell
Direct download: swingset302.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 11:07pm CST

Tonight, Madam Fierce joins the Mike Joseph, Dirty Lola, and Dylan to re-open the mailbag once again to give it the gang bang it deserves. The crew answers questions on the difference between swinging and polyamory, breaking up with another swing couple, swinging with too much enthusiasm, single male swingers, and first time swinging hiccups.

 

Question 1:

Hi guys, this is to all of you, though maybe first to Dylan, who seems to particularly enjoy contemplating these things.

I have been been listening to your podcasts since 2011, and have enjoyed the entire run.

What I have been struggling with intellectually is what differentiates swinging from polyamory. My wife and I have recently had acouples' experience which I think has cleared this up, at least for me. I am the introspective one in the relationship (she tends act quickly based on gut feelings of comfort, and chuckles at my additional ruminating), so this is really from the Mr.

We've been pretty successful with swinging / casual hookups, though Two things have happened recently that have changed things a bit.

First, my wife has maintained an online friendship with a single man since last spring, which I whole heartedly support, she's making plans to see him soon.

Secondly, we recently met a couple where I quickly developed a strong emotional connection with the wife. My wife has enjoyed the husband's company, but clearly isn't interested in anything more than casual. My wife supports my exploring this.

So, then, how to define what it is that we seem to be getting into? We areboth (probably) trying out hall passes, meeting folks one on one before the other has met them, and acknowledging at least one developing emotional connection with someone outside our relationship.

 

Question 2:

I was hoping you could give my wife and I some advice. My wife and I had talked about swinging for about a year before we actually met and played with our first couple. They checked so many of our boxes for a first encounter that we felt very fortunate to have met them.

The first time happened and was a reasonably good time. Not great by any means, but we didn't have any regrets as we popped our cherrys so to speak and we're both giddy for a month after. We discussed the apparent compatibility issues right away.

We decided to take another crack at the full swap with the same couple a month or so later to rule out nervousness. The second encounter allowed us another opportunity to hone in on the things that both did and didn't work for us. We had all but decided that this couple wasn't a compatible fit for us and although round 2 was better, we were still too far away from what we wanted.

Unfortunately, we went in for a third time, because we are slutty and it was easy to do.

Now the question:
How do you break up with a couple?

 

Question 3:

I'm a 39-yr old woman & new to all of this although I've been very much wanting to explore my bisexual & naughty sides for quite some time…, got a new boyfriend, he's 32, bisexual & we've been together for 1 month, already practically living together & saying the "L" word.

He's experienced in the swinging lifestyle (although it's been awhile) & is thrilled that I'm wanting/willing to try some new things with him. We've made a couples profile on 3 different sites & had 1 threesome already.

The problem is, I'm wanting to take it slow when it comes to women & couples ~ need to find the right person that I feel comfortable with and trust (to kinda get me past that nervousness hump) & he's all gung-ho about meeting people ASAP & making things happen, to the point of fiendish obsession (from my point of view, anyway). He's constantly on swinger sites, viewing profiles, suggesting potential action to me, and I'm rather picky, especially if I finally break into girl-on-girl play.

It's made me feel insecure, especially now that he's done most of the negotiation and now has started deleting messages, so I said something about it. We talked, he agreed he was moving too fast, but now I fear that I'm being petty.

Is this venture between him & I doomed? I'm not 100% sure what my boundaries are and I know I can't be the only woman on the planet to have unwelcome territorial feelings & insecurities crop up when first starting out.

How can I overcome that? I really want to do this, and I want to do it with this man.

Any advice would be greatly appreciated.

 

Question 4:

Hi Swingset, love your Swinging for Beginning series and hope to hear more in the future.

My wife and I tried NonMonogamy. It went great for her, it was disasterous for me. We made some mistakes that culminated in us ending up in an unintentional cuckold arrangement.

I'm faced with moving through the swinger community as a single male and I'm not sure how. Single female swingers are few and far between and single men are plentiful and often faced with limited or expensive access to clubs and other spaces. The swinger community is pretty anti-single male, I have no clue how to survive being one. I'm segregated from the community I want to be a part of and I don't how how to proceed. Help!

 

Question 5:

We had our first experience at an on premise party last weekend. Our rules going in were no penetration, whatever we do it's together - constant touching of each other and at the first sign of discomfort we bail and regroup. The biggest insecurities both had was getting into a situation and being ignored.

Unfortunately, the hubby drank way too much! We met a nice couple we were both comfortable with and stuck a pin in them for later, we then met another couple we liked and took the action upstairs. We started playing together but the my hubby seemed disconneted. The original couple came upstairs and my hubby went off with the wife. The rest of the night we moved independently, hubby with other women, me with other men and women.

The party ended, we went back to our rooms and ended up with more activity in which I felt ignored. My hubby's been apologizing ever since, he feels horrible and can't explain his actions. I feel like I should have ended things the first moment I felt ignored but I didn't. We're both confused and aren't sure how to proceed. Should we go out again but watch the drinking? Should we both be more free to speak up?

 

Join Cooper and Dylan as they host a class on Bacchanalia Basics at the Tool Shed in Milwaukee, WI on September 29th at 8:30PM!

 

You can support us while you buy great sex toys and products from our favorite online retailer SheVibe at lifeontheswingset.com/shevibe.

Help support Life on the Swingset continue to make podcasts, and put on live panels and shows into the future! Throw us a dollar (or a few) each time we release an episode on Patreon! Your support will also get you invited to a private chat system with other Swingsetters, and give you the opportunity to join live podcast recordings.

The best FREE thing you can do to support us is leave us a five-star review. Come to our review gateway, then copy and paste your review into iTunes or Stitcher!

Android Users: Download and review our Android App!

Leave us a comment on this post or at contact@lifeontheswingset.com or leave us a voicemail at 573-55-SWING (573-557-9464).

You can now pre-order Cooper's novel Approaching The Swingularity, his previous novel A Life Less Monogamous, or his memoir My Life on the Swingset: Adventures in Swinging & Polyamory as an ebook, paperback, or audiobook. Use promo code SWINGSET at coopersbeckett.com to save 10%.

Help Dylan edit by buying him something from his Amazon Wishlist!

 

 

Our 2017 THEME comes courtesy of Vlad Lucan and his track: Reverse!

 

Direct download: swingset301.mp3
Category:Swingset -- posted at: 7:59pm CST